Captain’s Log. Stardate 2016. We’ve landed in a curious new world overgrown with dense nasal foliage. Large golden boulders are strewn about the place and there’s a soft whistling wind in the air. We’re beginning to have breathing difficulties and Captain Pick-hard has injured himself. Back-up has been requested. We’ll be fine as soon as our ship beams down the Ray Gun Nose Trimmer.

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